Books are the shoes with which we tread the footsteps of great minds. Reduce the complexity of life by eliminating the needless wants of life, and the labors of life reduce themselves. Everything has been figured out, except how to live. A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on. The quality of the moment is more important than the number of our days. The Eskimo has fifty-two names for snow because it is important to them; there ought to be as many for love. Maybe this world is another planet's Hell. His ignorance is encyclopedic Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance. I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy. Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens. When you do the common things in life in an uncommon way, you will command the attention of the world. Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I'll waste no time reading it. Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. Everything has been figured out, except how to live. Why is it drug addicts and computer afficionados are both called users? Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right. When you do the common things in life in an uncommon way, you will command the attention of the world. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win. I'll moider da bum. What the world really needs is more love and less paper work. Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed. Solitude, if rightly used, becomes not only a privilege but a necessity. Only a superficial soul fears to fraternize with itself. All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher. The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it's their fault. C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg. The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth. We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough? Yesterday is a dream, tomorrow but a vision. But today well lived makes every yesterday a dream of happiness, and every tomorrow a vision of hope. Look well, therefore to this day. In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends. What do you take me for, an idiot? Of cheerfulness, or a good temper - the more it is spent, the more of it remains. Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories. Logic is in the eye of the logician.Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories. What lies behind us and what lies before us, are only small matters compared to what lies within us. Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down. But at my back I always hear Time's winged chariot hurrying near. Why is it drug addicts and computer afficionados are both called users? Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life. He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death. All right, Brain, I don't like you and you don't like me -- so let's just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer. Reality is an illusion that occurs due to lack of alcohol. Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks. In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is. Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are. The game of life is not so much in holding a good hand as playing a poor hand well. The game of life is not so much in holding a good hand as playing a poor hand well. Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down. There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread. Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street. Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth. Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street. Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks. The full use of your powers along lines of excellence. Grove giveth and Gates taketh away. When ideas fail, words come in very handy. How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread. Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens. Love is always bestowed as a gift - freely, willingly and without expectation. We don't love to be loved; we love to love. A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years. Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are. Nothing splendid has ever been achieved except by those who dared believe that something inside them was superior to circumstances. This book fills a much-needed gap But at my back I always hear Time's winged chariot hurrying near. The game of life is not so much in holding a good hand as playing a poor hand well. It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid. It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims. The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense. Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny. A book may lie dormant for fifty years or for two thousand years in a forgotten corner of a library, only to reveal, upon being opened, the marvels or the abysses that it contains, or the line that seems to have been written for me alone. In this respect the writer is not different from any other human being: whatever we say or do can have far-reaching consequences. When you're in love you never really know whether your elation comes from the qualities of the one you love, or if it attributes them to her; whether the light which surrounds her like a halo comes from you, from her, or from the meeting of your sparks. Try not to become a man of success but rather to become a man of value. Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza. If you are going through hell, keep going.